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God and Satan: Not so different

Judging by what the Bible says about them, it seems God and Satan do a lot of the same things.

God owns and controls the whole world. And so does Satan.

The devil doesn’t want people to do what’s right. And God doesn’t want people to even know what’s right.

The devil is a liar, and the father of lies. So is God, who deceives people all the time. God told the first lie, and he even uses his mind control powers to help Satan lie more effectively.

God made a tree with fruit that could bring death, as well as one with fruit that could bring immortality. And he punished humanity with death when they ate the fruit from the first of those trees. It’s not really clear whether or not he had made humans immortal to begin with, but either way, it is clear that God holds the power of death. And according to the Bible, so does the devil. (The devil doesn’t seem to do much with that power, though, unlike God, who is the reason people die.)

It’s the devil’s fault that there are evil people in the world. It’s also God’s fault that there are evil people in the world. How could it not be, if God is the ultimate cause of all things in existence? According to God, humans are just evil, and God really never should have made humans in the first place.

When people do evil, it’s often because they are being influenced by the devil. And far more often, it’s because they are being influenced by God. How could it not be, if everything that happens is part of God’s plan?

God ruined Job, a blameless and upright God-fearing man, destroying nearly everything Job had, for no reason. (The devil made him do it!) Then Satan inflicted physical torments on Job. (With God’s permission.) Actually, Satan helped a little when God was wrecking Job’s life. And God helped a lot when Satan was wrecking Job’s body. (Helped Satan, I mean, not helped Job.) Teamwork!

God teaches people not to blaspheme, and so does Satan. Apparently Satan is pretty helpful to Christians that way.

God saves people from hell, and so does Satan. Though the devil also gets in the way of people believing and being saved, and so does God. And Jesus.

Satan induces people to commit adultery, and so does God. Maybe that’s why Jesus thinks you need to ask God not to lead you into temptation.

According to 1 Chronicles, Satan incited David to take a census. And according to the version of that same story in 2 Samuel, God incited David to take a census. Both Satan and God are described as taking action against Israel when they do this. It’s like they’re allies or something.

Some people, particularly prophets, can only do and say what the Lord tells them to. He has taken them captive to do his will. Just like the devil, except with no hope of escape.

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The Story of Samson’s Riddle—
Out of the Strong, Some Way to Cheat

Samson was another judge, who saved his people when God let the Philistines take over Israel. Samson was a life-long Nazirite, which required him to abstain from wine, corpses, and haircuts.

While Samson was on his way to a Philistine city to visit a Philistine woman, he was attacked by a lion. God gave him the strength to easily kill the lion with his bare hands. Later, when he was on his way to the Philistine city again to marry the Philistine woman, he found that some bees had made a nest in the lion’s body. He took some honey out of the dead lion and shared it with his parents. But he didn’t tell anyone where the honey came from.

Samson challenged 30 Philistine men to try to solve a riddle by the end of his week-long wedding feast. They agreed that the losing party would have to give the winning party 30 sets of clothes. So Samson told them a “riddle” that they couldn’t possibly make sense of without knowing about the lion incident that no one but Samson knew about.

The Philistine men realized that Samson was unfairly trying to take their property. So they threatened to burn down his new wife’s house unless she told them the answer to the riddle. Samson’s wife cried constantly for the rest of the week until Samson gave her the answer. Then she told the answer to the men, and the men gave the answer back to Samson.

Samson knew those 30 Philistine men must have cheated, since there was no other way they could have possibly solved his “riddle”. But he gave them the promised 30 sets of clothes… which he got by killing 30 other Philistine men.

Continue reading The Story of Samson’s Riddle—
Out of the Strong, Some Way to Cheat
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The Story of the Tower of Babel—
Babble Babble Babble

When Noah’s flood had reduced the world population to 8, and while the population was recovering for a while after that, everyone in the world spoke the same language. People who had moved to the East started to build a great, unifying city with a huge tower that would reach to the heavens.

Continue reading The Story of the Tower of Babel—
Babble Babble Babble
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