The Bible contains a lot of questions, and it doesn’t always provide satisfactory answers. So I’ve been answering some of the Bible’s questions myself. This time, I’m looking at questions from the gospel of John.
Two of John the Baptist’s disciples ask Jesus: Where are you staying? (Jesus’s answer is to take them to see the place where he’s staying.) Alternative biblical answer: He has no place to lay his head.
Nathanael asks: Can anything good come from Nazareth? Answer: It’s the Silicon Valley of the Arab community.
A Samaritan woman asks Jesus: You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink? Answer: Why not? Do you think he has to be prejudiced just because he’s a Jew? I think you’re projectjudiced.
She asks Jesus: Where can you get this living water? Answer: For all we know, he can’t. The Bible never says Jesus actually permanently cured anyone’s thirst.
The non-Iscariot Judas asks Jesus: Why do you intend to show yourself to us and not to the world? Answer: Because Jesus hates the world, and doesn’t want to have to save it.
Pilate asks the Jewish religious leaders: What charges are you bringing against this man? Answer: Jewish blasphemy law violations that the Romans can’t prosecute, because they aren’t against the Roman law, so it’s pointless to bring those charges.
Pilate asks: Am I a Jew? Answer: I don’t think so.
He asks: What is truth? Answer: Truth is when what you think or say matches reality.
The Jews’ questions
Nicodemus asks: How can someone be born when they are old? Answer: Who said you have to do it when you’re old?
The Jews ask: How can this man give us his flesh to eat? Answer: Let me see… He could cut off parts of himself for you, or he could give you permission to eat him after he dies,1 or he could just let you eat him alive…
The Jewish religious leaders ask: Where is he? Answer: Jesus is at the festival he said he wasn’t going to go to.
The Jews at the temple ask: How did this man get such learning without having been taught? Answer: He didn’t. Jesus has been learning from religious teachers since he was a boy.
The Jews ask Jesus: Who is trying to kill you? Answer: The leaders are trying to kill him. The common people, who he just accused of trying to kill him, are not.
Some of the people of Jerusalem ask: Isn’t this the man they are trying to kill? Answer: Yes.
And they ask: Have the authorities really concluded that he is the Messiah? Answer: No.
The Pharisees ask: Have any of the rulers or any of the Pharisees believed in him? (Their self answer: No!) Real answer: Yes.
The teachers of the law and Pharisees ask Jesus: In the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say? Answer: Jesus says rules that he made up, that are incompatible with God’s Law.
The Jews ask: Will he kill himself? Is that why he says, “Where I go, you cannot come”? Answer: I didn’t know Jews were immortal.
Some Jews ask Jesus: Aren’t we right in saying that you are a Samaritan and demon-possessed? Answer: No, he’s not a Samaritan.
And they ask him: Who do you think you are? Answer: He thinks he’s the son of God.2
Some Pharisees ask: How can a sinner perform such signs? Answer: God says false prophets can do miracles too. It sounds like God even helps them do their miracles, for sinful purposes.
Many Jews who hear Jesus talking ask: He is demon-possessed and raving mad. Why listen to him? Answer: To hear for yourself how crazy he is.
Other Jews disagree, and ask: Can a demon open the eyes of the blind? Answer: Demons can perform signs, so I don’t see why not.
After Lazarus dies, some Jews ask: Couldn’t he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying? Answer: He could have if he wanted to, but he chose not to, just because he wanted to get to show off.
Before Passover, many Jews ask: Isn’t he coming to the festival at all? Answer: Yes.
An official asks Jesus: Is this the way you answer the high priest? Answer: Yes, the way Jesus answered the high priest is the way Jesus answers the high priest.